Tiny Brave Steps: Real Women. Real Fear. Real Courage Stories.
She was told by her own team that if she got into trouble, they wouldn’t come to save her. She showed up anyway—every single day for fourteen years. She walked into literal fires while fighting one inside her own chest. And one day, she decided surviving wasn’t enough anymore.
That’s one story. There are so many more.
Tiny Brave Steps is where real women tell the truth about the hardest things they’ve ever walked through—and how they found their way to the other side.
Not with some dramatic, made-for-TV moment. But with what I call Tiny Brave Steps - the kind of courage that happens one terrified, trembling choice at a time.
These are women who’ve faced the fire.
A surgery that stole everything and gave her more than she ever imagined.
A caregiving journey with no finish line.
A fourteen-year silence finally broken.
These aren’t superhero stories. They’re your-neighbor, your-sister, your-friend stories. The kind where you listen and think, That could be me.
I’m Bernice McDonald, Creator of the Tiny Brave Steps method and author of The Little Books of Courage.
Each episode, I walk you through one woman’s journey using the Courage Map - a path from feeling “not enough” to becoming “brave enough.”
You’ll hear her real voice. Her real fear. And the real moment she decided to take that next step - even though her hands were shaking.
Because here’s the truth I want you to know: Courage is never the absence of fear. It’s the judgment that something matters more than the fear.
If you’ve ever whispered I’m not brave enough for this—this podcast was made for you.
New episodes weekly. Bring your heart. Leave with courage.
Tiny Brave Steps: Real Women. Real Fear. Real Courage Stories.
Sarka's Story: When Perfect Was Never The Point
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
For years, two things ran Sarka’s life without her seeing them: she didn’t believe in herself, and she thought she had to be perfect.
It took a hard question — where will you be in 20 years? — before she turned around and looked to see what her life was becoming.
She became an entrepreneur with no savings and no plan, learned to answer her own fear instead of fighting it, and said yes to a TEDx stage she almost didn’t get — the one she forgot three times in rehearsal and gave anyway.
Today she helps other people out of hiding, the way someone once helped her.
Her message is simple and hard to do unless you know how: you are enough, but it's not a mantra.
It's something you learn to feel right down to your toes.
CONNECT WITH THE LOVELY SARKA RISCH. You'll be glad you did.
LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/sarka-risch
Website: www.sarkarisch.com
Hosted by Bernice McDonald — Life & Courage Strategist, speaker, and author.
Need to find YOUR Next Step through a hard thing you're facing? Have a simple conversation with the Tiny Brave Steps Generator AI: www.tinybravesteps.com.
Connect with Bernice:
Email: bernice@bernicemcdonald.com
Website: www.tinybravesteps.com
Join me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/bernicemcdonald/
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Do YOU have a Courage Story you'd like to share? Send Bernice a message.
No one is born brave. Courage is one of those things that gets built a little at a time, mostly on the days you're afraid. I'm Bernice McDonald, and this is Sarka's Courage Story. One little thing before we begin. Sarka's story touches on the loss of a friend, and it's held with great care all the way through her story. I just wanted to mention that before we start. Courage like Sarka's tends to get built in four movements. Nobody realizes that they're walking this path while they're on it. Sarka did. You feel these movements long before you have words for them. So if you're listening and you're someone who's ever been sure that you weren't enough and just as sure that you had to be perfect to make up for it, this one's for you. Act one, wake up your courage. Waking up your courage is the day you stop calling it This Is Just Who I Am. And start to see that it had a beginning. Ask Sarka where her story starts, and she definitely won't tell you that it starts with a win.
SPEAKER_01My story that goes through my whole life is that I didn't believe in myself. And uh and I also I want to be perfect, but I didn't realize that. I realized that slowly, but first I had to go through some situations that I experienced that brought me also to where I am today.
SPEAKER_00Two voices whispering under everything she did. You're not enough. You should be perfect. She heard them so early and so often that she didn't know they were voices at all. Maybe you know that sound, but the one that's been there so long, it just feels like it's the truth. Something happened in college that really shook Sarka's world. It was a moment that would take her years to understand. She had a close friend, the kind you tell the real things to. And one day her friend in confidence told her the real thing.
SPEAKER_01She it was at the college, and she told me about her fears that she can't manage everything because she wanted to be perfect. At that time, I didn't realize I wanted to be uh perfect too, but she was really a lot, really the real perfectionist. And I was talking to her about this, and I tried to help her.
SPEAKER_00Sarka listened. She tried to help, and she went home believing that there would be more time. The next day, her friend was gone. She had taken her own life.
SPEAKER_01I was I was thinking about the the conversation we had and how I wanted to help her, but um yeah, it's it uh it did it didn't help.
SPEAKER_00It didn't help. Three small words, and can you hear everything folded inside them. She carried them for years. She didn't have anywhere to put pain like that yet. So she did what so many of us do. She worked even harder at being perfect. Years later, there was another moment, smaller, no one was lost, but it shone a light on the very same place. She walked into a CEO's office to ask for a raise. The first time in her life she'd asked out loud to be valued.
SPEAKER_01Listen to what she was hoping he would do. When I came to my boss, to the CEO to ask for the pay raise for the first time in my life. And he actually wanted to know how much I think I'm how much is the value, how much I would love, I would like to have more. And I expected to him to tell me what I'm worth for them. I also showed him all the statistics, all the revenue I brought to the company, all the tourists that came uh to the mountain where I was working. But anyway, he told me just like, I don't know what you are doing, and he actually didn't believe in myself.
SPEAKER_00She brought him the numbers, and what she really wanted was the one thing numbers can't ask for. She wanted somebody else to tell her what she was worth. He couldn't. How could he? She was expecting him to give her something that he could not give. It took her years to see what was actually happening in that office. This was the mirror.
SPEAKER_01What was here in my in my inner world. That's the wake up.
SPEAKER_00She didn't believe in herself. So what did she hear over and over? The same message given back to her by the world. Not because the world was right, but because we hear what we already believe. Then in 2019, out of the blue, a question showed up. I had a thought that came into my mind.
SPEAKER_01And the thought was, where do you see yourself in 20 years? And I didn't have an answer. I was just traveling for my employer. I was working a lot, but actually I was working from day to day, going to gym, going on vacations, and that was it. I realized that I wasn't living with purpose.
SPEAKER_00No crisis, no breaking point, just a quiet question with no answer. Sometimes that's all a wake up is. Now, about that voice, the one that kept telling her she wasn't enough. We all have one, right? It's been with us since we were small. And here at Tiny Braid Steps, we do something a little strange with that voice. We give it a form, set it up just outside ourselves, and we name it Fred. Fred is fear, but listen now, he's not the enemy of your story or of mine or of sarcasm. He knows everything that has ever hurt you, every room that made you feel small, and his whole job, as he understands it, is making sure none of it ever happens to you again. The trouble is his idea of keeping you safe is to shrink you, to keep you small so you don't outstand out. Fred is the part of Sarka that learned early on that being perfect and staying invisible was how she stayed protected. He'd been riding along in the car of her life the entire way. He rides along for the rest of this story too, and keep listening because where he sits in the car is about to change. In 2021, Sarka met someone who saw something in her that she couldn't see in herself.
SPEAKER_01She told me I see you as an entrepreneur. And I said, No, no way, because I didn't have any entrepreneurial experiences. I didn't have any savings.
SPEAKER_00No experience, no savings, every reason to say no. And underneath all of them, the old voice that said, That's not me. But the words wouldn't leave her alone. They started her thinking, searching. Could it be possible? Could that woman really be in here? And I love what she did next. Because she didn't take a giant leap, she turned inward first. She went back to her friend, to that office, to the question she couldn't answer. She went looking for the thread that ran through all of it, and she found it with a word from the Kabbalah she studies.
SPEAKER_01And my tikkun is really this so uh this um low self uh self-worth. So that's really this I'm not enough, and that's also why I want it to be perfect, because I wanted to show that actually I am enough.
SPEAKER_00There it was, out loud at last, the perfect friend, the perfect employee, the best value every single time, all of it growing from one root. I am not enough, and I'll spend my whole life proving otherwise.
SPEAKER_01And then I went back to the story with my friend, and I realized actually, yeah, I wanted to be perfect as well. My parents wanted me that I have a perfect life, and I wanted yeah, to to be like to give the best every time, the best value. I mean, I still want it, but we are humans and nobody is perfect.
SPEAKER_00Notice what she says there. We are humans and nobody is perfect. That's not a woman fixing herself, that's a woman forgiving herself. There's a difference, and you can feel it.
SPEAKER_01We are humans, we make mistakes, we learn from mistakes, but we are not perfect. And when we accept this and work on our imperfection, work on our mistakes, then we can move forward.
SPEAKER_00And then she learned something I wish somebody had taught me decades ago. She learned to answer the voice instead of fighting it.
SPEAKER_01One of the big learnings for me is really when your negative uh thoughts come up, really to say stop, and then ask yourself, how would I like to have it? Okay, you are here. This is this is the fear. I acknowledge it. Um what can I do? Where is the solution? What what will help me that I can overcome it?
SPEAKER_00To hear what she's doing. She's not arguing with the fear. She's not pretending it isn't there. She turns, in fact, toward it. The way you turn toward an old friend who worries too much and she asks it questions.
SPEAKER_01I mean fears are here, they protect us as well, they teach us, and then it's also too important to ask, what is the fear, what is the challenge teaching me?
SPEAKER_00Fred, our protector, gets heard, gets thanked, and gets saddled gently into the back seat. He's still in the car, he always will be, but he will never be driving. Stand up for you. Standing up for you is when the private work steps out into a room where people can see it. For nine years, Sarka watched from the edge.
SPEAKER_01I was always on LinkedIn as a lurker for nine years, and then I decided, okay, I have to invest in myself, I have to learn how the platform works because I was lost there. I didn't know how to connect with people, how to write with them, what to post. And actually, I thought I don't have a story.
SPEAKER_00Nine years of reading other people's words, other people's stories, thinking, not me, never will be. But she had a dream she barely said out loud, a TEDx stage.
SPEAKER_01I had also the dream of helping others, of inspiring others through a TEDx talk. But again, I thought I don't have a story. And then I I took the courage, I I sent my videos to apply, and I got the response that I was a substitute, so that if someone will not or can't give the TEDx talk, then I can um do I can give my TEDx talk. And I was thinking, okay, I think nobody will uh will ever cancel the TEDx talk. So I just let go. And then I got a phone call on uh Friday afternoon if I would love to give a TEDx talk next week on Thursday. Of course I said yes, I'd love to. They told me, yeah, you can think about it. I thought I said no, no, I I want to do it.
SPEAKER_00Yes, I'll do it. Before Fred could even finish his sentence to try to talk her out of it. Only three days. She had clients to look after and a talk to polish.
SPEAKER_01So then I had like three days to prepare. Of course, I I worked already with uh with the TEDx uh coach. I I was in his program, and then I had a friend of mine, she gave three TEDx talks. When I had this phone call, I immediately contacted her and she helped me with the preparation as well.
SPEAKER_00So a friend who'd stood on three TEDx stages before helped her get ready. Then came the rehearsal.
SPEAKER_01But when I was on the stage for the rehearsal, I was the only one who forgot to talk.
SPEAKER_00Standing there, empty, in front of everyone. Now be honest, what would the voice in your head be saying right then? Hers had plenty to say too, but here's what she did with it.
SPEAKER_01So I I had to go and uh I had it in on my mobile so I could continue the story. But for me it was it was clear like, okay, I want to practice uh and what should I do? So I I connected with myself, I imagined how the stress is going away, like a waterfall. I visualized myself on the stage and I asked myself, how can I make this happen? And the answer was you have to practice. So then I asked a technician if I could do the rehearsal for myself again, and they told me, yeah, they have some issues with the light, and uh after they fix it, I can do that. And I mean I had time. The telex talk was in the evening, it was afternoon, so yeah, no problem. And I could do this uh do it again. And uh I forgot I forgot the text again.
SPEAKER_00Again, she asked a third time, and somewhere inside that third try.
SPEAKER_01And then I asked once more, please, could I start once more? And I okay, do we have time? Okay, yes, so and then I did it. And at that moment I knew, okay, I will make it, but I have to really calm down.
SPEAKER_00The night of the talk, she sat in the back row and ran her waterfall one more time until the stress came down. She was the second speaker. She walked out and started.
SPEAKER_01And then I was uh on the stage and everything uh went well. And at like almost at the end, there was in the next room opera singer, and she started to sing. You can you can actually hear it in the in the YouTube video. It was not so um not so loud, but when you pay attention, you can hear it. Some people didn't hear it, but I heard it, of course. Then I was again, okay. In my uh mind, it was like this voice telling me, focus on yourself, focus on your talk. So I did that, and I gave a talk, I gave a talk. Uh yeah, a little bit when she started to sing, I forgot something, but actually I said what I wanted to say. And afterward, at the break. And people came to me, I I didn't expect it. They came to me and told me how much I inspired them. And really, like, oh, we can so relate to a story, and it was so inspiring. I was like, wow, this was my goal, so I made it.
SPEAKER_00Just think about what she'd done. Her talk was about perfectionism, about the years she didn't believe in herself, said out loud, on a stage, on camera, and the room didn't reject her, it didn't turn away. The room came closer and said us two.
SPEAKER_01And this was actually the first time for me where I shared my story publicly. The talk was about how I overcame perfectionism, but I also shared that I didn't believe in myself. And this was really where I realized, okay, everyone has a story.
SPEAKER_00For Sarka, standing up wasn't only on the stage, it was smaller rooms, harder choices. Learning to notice who left her lighter and who left her empty.
SPEAKER_01Once you start doing this inner work, then more and more things happen. And then you see how how perfect it is, and then you also realize that not everyone who you had in your life, like friends, uh goes in the same direction. And then I realized also I learned it's also important to let go, and then you ask yourself, okay, is it my still my friend, or is this person still in her or his fears and focusing on the negative things? And does this actually give me energy, or does this cost me energy? And when I felt really drained after some meetings with some friends, I decided, okay, this is actually not what I want to do.
SPEAKER_00She gave the ones who drained her a chance, and then she let them go. I wanted to sit here for just a breath because this deserves a pause. The woman who once couldn't save a friend was learning which friendship she could hold and which she had to release. That takes its own kind of courage.
SPEAKER_01One thing I would add, also setting boundaries. This is what I learned as well. Like every no to someone else means yes to myself.
SPEAKER_00Here's how she says it every no to someone else is a yes to herself after a lifetime of yes to everyone but herself. And some days the yes to herself didn't really look like that much.
SPEAKER_01And really take the time to care, take care of myself, of my mind, of my soul, of my health, of my fitness as well. And really, for me, it's also important to stay in nature, to enjoy the silence. I love animals. I don't have any but to stay with them, to just pet them. For me, this is like, oh my god, I connect too much, I disconnect with all the worlds, and I disconnect with all these challenges that I have and all these deadlines and everything, and just be with myself.
SPEAKER_00At four, create your impact. Creating your impact is when the thing that nearly undid you becomes the thing you hand to someone else. A year before all of this, at a retreat she was attending, Sarka wrote down a dream she wasn't sure she was allowed to even want. She wanted another week-long retreat in America on a beach. She had no idea how it would ever happen, and some part of her, you can guess which part, was sure it never would. And then one day, there she was, standing on that beach.
SPEAKER_01And then I was standing at the beach on Marco Island, and during the retreat I was like, oh my god. It was I felt such a big gratitude, and I can't even describe this feeling. Joy, gratitude, uh love, and this was like, oh my god, I I can't even believe it. I'm here.
SPEAKER_00The dream she wrote down back when she didn't believe in herself, now a reality. Her own two feet in the sand.
SPEAKER_01When I work with my clients, so many people don't have clarity on LinkedIn, but also in their lives, and also the right positioning. What they are standing for, what are their messages, where they would like to help, who, and yeah, of course, what what their goals are. Many clients that came to me are experts, but they are not sharing their expertise in public because of the fear of judgment, fear of not being enough.
SPEAKER_00She knows that fear by its first name. And she does the thing someone once did for her.
SPEAKER_01People are moved to and they change something because I take them on the hand and I bring them actually from their fears to believing in themselves and to realizing okay, when I share my story or my journey, I will help others and inspire them.
SPEAKER_00She takes them by the hand from their fears to believing in themselves. And if Sarka could sit down across from the woman she used to be, the one who lost her friend, the one who sat in that office waiting to be told her worth, here's what she'd say.
SPEAKER_01I would say you are enough. Just believed in it and move forward with this confidence and courage and with all your curiosity and never stop listening to intuition because it guides you. And then the hard part. Yes, this feeling of you are enough. This is this is really powerful, but it has to be felt. If someone says says it, oh okay, I'm enough, and doesn't it doesn't mean nothing. So you really have to feel it from the bottom of your heart and really to imagine it as well and to be grateful, to be grateful for your life, and to be abundant in that way.
SPEAKER_00Not perfect. Hear the difference. You can say I am enough a hundred times into the mirror, and the words only start to matter on the day you let yourself feel them. Courage was never a finish line she crossed. It's something she practices, some days better than others, same as you, same as me. She leaves us here. And we have everything within us, we only have to reveal it. So if you are a woman who's been hiding, sure you're not enough. Sure, you have to be perfect first. I want you to hear this from Sarka and from me. You don't have to become enough. You already are. You just have to let yourself feel it. And if there's a dream that you haven't written down yet, write it down now. That's a tiny brave step. That's all it takes. And that's how this whole thing works. So I say thank you, Sarka. Thank you for going back for the woman you used to be and for going first. So the next woman doesn't have to be the only one. She helps people now to show up and be seen. Not only on LinkedIn, her specialty, but also in their lives. You can connect with her at sarcarish.com. You'll find the links in the episode notes. And you can find us at tinybravesteps.com. Courage isn't something you're born with, remember. And it isn't something you find, it's something you build. One tiny brave step at a time. You are brave enough for this. You always have been.